Please don't forget to read my first post "MEET KENNEDY" it will give you his story from the begining , It's where you get a glimpse of how we both got to this point in our lives. To a transitioned child...... and as a mother to my daughter to a mother to my son. From an upset misunderstood child to a happy robust boy ready to embrace the world!!

Thank you

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Embarrassed to go Potty!

Everyone knows what it feels like to be embarrassed, right?
We have all felt that way once or twice in our life and for me....many times. Although can you imagine being embarrassed about using the restroom? Kennedy brought a friend to dinner with us, he needed to use the restroom so he went off to the bathroom. His friend also had to go so he followed right behind him. Kennedy came running back from the restroom, "mommy I don't want Jonathan to see me go to the girls potty..." I said OK"are you wanting to use the boys?" he said "no then he will see me go in the stall and I am embarrassed about that". Not wanting to go in either bathroom he waited for Jonathan to return and then sped off to the restroom holding him self cause he had to wait. I feel for my child each and every day. He has to experience life a whole different way and have usual situations become an embarrassing one. It is going to be a long road for my little one.

I know it may seem like no big deal to have to wait, but this is just one example of our life struggles. Nothing is just "normal". Although Kennedy has to face more than others in his every day life, he is also very happy and willing to smile everyday...I just hope that continues.

I know that there is no one to blame for these discomforts but if we all try to educate, show passion and understanding we can limit the amount of discomfort along the way.

Thanks for listening!


  1. It sounds like an uphill battle sometimes, but patience will go a long way in getting Kennedy to a place where he'll be confident to go anywhere on his own.

  2. Dear Ken,

    Some boys go in a stall because they don't want to be standing next to other boys in the bathroom. For all the years that I had to pretend to be a boy, I ALWAYS sat in a stall. Especially when I was younger and I still thought boys had cooties. I'm a bit older now so I know you don't. Boys are every bit as cool as girls.

    So by all means just stroll right in like you belong there because you do. You're every bit as much a boy as Jon is, and there is NOTHING wrong with going in a stall. Please don't be embarrassed, you did nothing wrong, did nothing to deserve this, and this is not your fault.


  3. I'm a trans guy in college. My college is one of the most accepting wonderful places I've ever been. When I came out they handled it beautifully.

    I still don't use the gendered bathrooms here.

    There are enough gender neutral bathrooms around that I can get away with that. But there aren't any in the library, cafeteria, or one of the clasroom buildings. And those buildings are all clustered together.

    NOBODY would care if I used the guys bathroom. Nobody would care if I used the girls bathroom. Truly, not one person would care.

    But I always worry that they would care. That one time somebody would comment. So I just duck out to the lecture hall. It's imperfect. It also took my friends over 2 years to notice.

  4. I reread this post often because it reminds me of my ongoing battle. There are many times when I feel conflicted about going to the restroom in public. I'll even go so far as to drive all the way home just so I can use the restroom. I know this will change when I start to look more like a male though. Just let little Kennedy know that he is not alone. I really hope to meet your family someday! Please send me an email if you are interested. God Bless!


  5. i will never understand the fuss over the gendering of public bathrooms,for goodness sake we go in there for one reason, make them all single stalls,no urinals with full doors and who cares??? take the labels off I say.


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