Please don't forget to read my first post "MEET KENNEDY" it will give you his story from the begining , It's where you get a glimpse of how we both got to this point in our lives. To a transitioned child...... and as a mother to my daughter to a mother to my son. From an upset misunderstood child to a happy robust boy ready to embrace the world!!


Thank you



Monday, July 5, 2010

HOW DO I KNOW MY CHILD IS TRANSGENDER??

This article (posted at bottom) is important to me so copy and past link below to read it. First it explains to people about transgender and how it is different than just a phase or a tomboy personality. Transgender goes way deeper than liking boy things or girl things it goes way deep to the true since of self and emotional well being.

Use this article to educate your self and if it may help you understand transgender community. If you read this and think you may have or be a transgender than please explore that and get as much info as you can to protect yourself or your child. I'm not saying all people who like other sex things are transgender. By no means is that true, transgendered people have a way deeper emotional since of the opposite sex and they are not comfortable being the sex they were born as, that is one main difference. Please use this article to learn and accept others and understand the Transgender world.

If you ever need more info please feel free to contact me by leaving a message for a private email I will be willing to help. If it is questions about yourself or your child....all is welcome.

For my controversy..(all the people that say, your doing the wrong thing you simply have a tomboy)....
Believe me I know there are tomboys...I have met many in my life and understand that they love all things that are boy. But being a transgender is totally different these children truly believe deep with in their selves that they are a boy or a girl. They feel as though they are trapped in the wrong body. This is not typical when it comes to a tomboy. Tomboys know they are female, and like that about them selves. Although they are more interested in masculine interest, it it stops there and that is a "tomboy". A trans child feels uncomfortable as being identified as female (or vice verse), and they get emotionally depressed to live as one.
OK now I'm going to give you some examples of the comments I have heard or received and my responses to them.

Comment:
"I loved boy stuff or I know someone who wanted to be a boy her whole life now she is a beautifull women married with children"

My Response to this:
Great, I'm glad that your situation was handled with care and you or the person you know developed into what they wanted. I want the same for my child, if Kennedy continues down this path....fine, if he changes coarse....that is fine too. I let him know all the time he is free to be a girl or accept himself as being a girl.
I didn't want him to be a boy or a girl, I want him to like him self and love his life as feels it should be. Kennedy may change some day, who knows?? What harm is there in letting your child feel happy about himself? Verse hating everything they see in the mirror or hating what people refer to him as. Kennedy hated looking like a female everyday he wined to me to change his clothes...shoes...hair...and undies. He said "mommy please believe me... I'm a boy...please mommy...I want you to believe me, please believe me". Kennedy didn't understand why everyone thought he was a girl, he didn't see what they saw. He saw him self as a boy and I had to explain to him why he wasn't one, he said that one part of body that GOD forgot makes me a girl.
How many tomboys say thing like that?? Come on people some children are tomboys some are transgender...please read more about it before you pass your judgement, at least make an attempt to make an educated response!


Comment:
Your making him believe he is a boy or your letting him be something he isn't and you should teach him or make him stop all this nonsense!

My Response:
Ever heard of feeling happy with who you are?? Well my child feels that who he really is....is a boy. I have no right as a parent or another human being to tell someone else who they truly are or how they should feel. I am not in Kennedy's head or in his mind, heart, thoughts of self. I don't know for sure how he really feels so why would I make him conform if I don't even know how that makes him feel inside about himself. He is the only one who knows how he /she feels and not I nor any of you do. I don't think it is right to "make" other people conform to what I say they are. It is a big part of who you are..of your own identity to be called male or female....boy or girl.....man or women, this isn't as easy as telling your child NO to a hair cut or type of dress or shoe choice's, those things are small things that a parent can govern, but how do you govern someones sole since of self? Their identity? Kennedy will always be free to make his own decesions if that means live as a male for the rest of his life, fine if that means accepting that he is female...fine too... it his life, not mine! I'm hear to love him, nuture him, guide him and make sure he loves his life and his self!!

The bottom line is I want my child to be happy......and guess what
I know that my child is happy. If he is happy he will have a good childhood. He will be able to accept himself, feel secure. If he were to live with this as a girl he would still be that angry child who didn't like themself. Anyone who truely knows my child agrees he is way happier and has blossomed into a very confident child...how is that a bad thing?
Please do your research, please..... take time to understand diffrent conditions.... take time to open your heart to things you don't understand..... take time to love people just they way they are.



http://www.socialwo rkblog.org/ helpstartshere/ index.php/ 2008/05/30/ how-do-i- know-if-my- child-is- transgender/